Even since I was in the UK, I knew that when I came back to Malaysia, I wanted to teach Middle Eastern Dance (belly dancing) to Malaysian women. Not as a career, but something that I wanted to do. Now a little background check, I have never had any professional dance training (besides the Egyptian Belly Dancing classes and courses that I went to in the UK), I came from a traditional albeit forward-minded Muslim family (but no, no of course dancing is out of question), I was supposed to be working in a BIG 4 audit companies/or to do my master. But I said, uh-uh, not yet, let’s see whether I can do this ‘teaching-belly dancing’ thing first 
I thought of ways of how I will go about it. I did a marketing survey (only to about 3 of my friends, eheh). I did the thinking. The analysing. The number crunching (I am an accounting and finance grad ). I have a goal, I have a plan!
But after that,
I went round and round and round in a circle thinking – and I came up with many, many reasons of why I should not do it.
I am not ready yet, I am not good enough, Malaysia is not ready yet, Malaysian cannot accept Middle Eastern Dance (belly dancing), Muslims cannot appreciate it, I will be scorned, I will be asked to bare my belly, I will need to take off my head-scarves, what will my parent say, what will my friends say, what will my lecturers say, what will my cousins say, what will everybody in this world will say??
Needless to say, for quite sometime all I ever have is a ‘goal’ and ‘plan’. Tucked nicely in my diary.
Until one day, I sort of decide to take action and do something about it. Mustering all my courage and putting on my best ‘belly-dancing instructor’ face (don’t ask me I don’t know what that is) – I approached a gym near my then-office (wearing my 9-5 office clothes) , inquiring to teach Middle Eastern Dance. They said they will look into it. I waited, 2 months. Nothing. I asked them again, they said they will look into it. I waited again, 2 months. I never heard anything from them again.
I was crushed. I blamed Malaysia, I blamed the gym manager, I blamed the weather. I went on blaming everybody and anything that I can put the blame on – and I was ready to give up. My self-esteem took a plunge as rejection was not an easy thing to deal with (for me at that time). Then I asked myself, do I still want to teach the dance? Yes. If I stop trying just because 1 person said no will I be able to do it? No.
So I suck it up and keep approaching every single gym and fitness centres in KL (that I can find in Google) and keep e-mailing them (note the phrase, keep e-mailing, not just e-mailed-once-that’s-it). I went for audition (rase macam artis sket2 pun ade). I did free demonstration. I advertised my teaching service online. Now I am getting more positive responses. Some were nice, some were not, some were perplexed as why did this young Muslim Malay chick with a tudung wants to teach belly dancing?
It’s not easy to keep the motivation up. There were many times I just want to give up. Doubts were aplenty and negative whispers were at every corner. Time and time again, I asked myself – is this worth the pain and the heartache? Along the process, I also realised many of my weaknesses that I need to address. Being a fresh grad, there is so much that I didn’t know and that I need to learn. So, what did I do? – I read. I learnt best from reading, so read and read and read I did. I read motivational books, business books, communication skills, presentation skills, marketing skills, selling skills. I am always at MPH, Kinokuniya and Borders (buying books or browsing books that I can’t afford to buy). Whatever little thing that I can apply from my reading, I put it into practise. I see results and improvement. I am ecstatic!
I taught my first class of Middle Eastern Dance to Malaysian women, 5 months after I decided to take action. From then on, my classes expanded and I get to do what I always wanted to do since I was in the UK – to teach Malaysian women to belly dance. Now my dream was always to teach Malaysian women, not Malay women or Chinese women or Indian women – and because of that I am always blessed with a mixed-culture ladies in my class.Besides, I also managed to do all that without compromising my principle. In fact, I was known as the ‘cikgu belly dancing yang pakai tudung’. 
From there, I expand my venture into conducting workshops, selling Middle Eastern Dance accessories, and organising my own all-women event. I approached it all in a true entrepreneurial spirit, and because of that I believe my entrepreneurial skills has been sharpened bit by bit!
I know it’s not much. I mean, not like my goal is to find cure for cancer, or to make million bucks in 3 months or anything news-worthy or ground-breaking. But it felt nice. No, it felt GREAT to be able to achieve what you set your mind to, and to went through the whole journey until you achieve it. It was wonderful and delightful and I wish it on everybody this wonderful feeling and experience .
Because I did it once, I know that I can do it again. I now have different goals and bigger dreams that I am working towards everyday. There are days that I still feel like giving up, but when I looked back and remembered that I have done it before, I feel better and I know if I keep taking action, my dream will be realised, Insya-Allah.
Copyright © Naziehah 2008
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Image 1 from here
Image 2 from NUR magazine Jan2008 feature.
